"Batgirl, Interrupted" - 02/28/2010

"Batgirl, Interrupted"
02/28/2010

I was at this insane frat party. The entire house was full of people - standing room only - and it was one Hell of a house. Downstairs, in one far corner of the house, was where the junkies seemed to hang out, and they were all down there doing God knows what, while everyone else was partaking in less seedy activities. Sometime during the night, I found myself downstairs, moving through the area where the junkies were having this hypodermic orgy and partying their asses off. Everyone was sharing needles with everyone else, and everyone was visibly stoned off their asses. This wasn't my thing, but apparently I had friends down here. Suddenly, I felt a pinprick. I can't remember if it was on my arm or my lower body, but it was on my right side. I knew, immediately, that I had just been stuck with something that was just going around, and I was terrified, because I didn't know what it was or how much I was just given.

Practically jumping out of my skin, I pushed the stranger's arm away from me and turned around to see who had just injected me. There was this absolutely smokin' chick standing in front of me, with short, black hair. (Looked kinda like This picture of Victoria Beckham.) She was swaying and grinning widely - her eyes nearly shut - and she was apparently wasted off of something. She kept telling me to relax and have a good time. I was worried about what she just gave me, and at first she was having fun with my not knowing. She just refused to tell me what it was, and she kept teasing me about it. We talked a little bit, though, and she turned out to be really cool and down to earth - outside of having her fun at my expense. I asked her again, in all seriousness, what she had stuck me with. She said it was "just codeine", and aside from possibly feeling a little drunk, I would be fine. She said this with a very matter-of-fact - but reassuring - "dude, don't freak out" smile on her face, that actually made her all the more attractive. We flirted a lot, but I decided not to get too wrapped up with her, because apparently she had a problem with a lot more than "just codeine," and I didn't want too much to do with that sorta scenario. The sexual chemistry was definitely there, though, so while I didn't completely go after her, I filed her away as a 'maybe,' and ended up going back to another section of the party.

Later, a really rowdy bunch of bikers showed up to the party. Their leader appeared to be Bobcat Goldthwait, playing a loud, over-the-top character like his Zed from the Police Academy movies, but much younger and more built - more threatening, overall. This group actually turned out to be shape-shifters. They morphed into these reptilian creatures that looked almost like Xenomorphs. (I've been playing the AvP demo lately, on the ps3.) Pretty soon, the entire party was in chaos, and these things were going around, attacking everyone in sight. I don't really remember how it happened, but I ended up getting the black, symbiote Spider-Man suit. It had something to do with the shape-shifters' being here, and I just happened to be the one to get my hands on the living, extra-terrestrial suit. An absolutely insane battle ensued - with me as the black-suited Spidey - but I don't remember too much of it.

What I do remember is that I got my ass handed to me by these things. I was buried in a pile of rubble, on top of a high building, somewhere else in the city, and felt like I was just regaining consciousness. I remember being pulled out of the rubble by some unknown figure. It took me a moment, straining to focus my eyes, but I slowly began to realize who it was. It was dark out, but there was the occasional white flash of what seemed to be a spotlight sweeping across our position.

It was the girl from the party...but she was dressed as Batgirl. No. She wasn't just dressed as Batgirl. She was Batgirl. The armored suit she had on was amazing - definitely the real deal (and actually kind of masculine, as if it was fitted for Batman's torso). She hauled me out of the pile of pulverized metal and stone. Throwing anonymity to the wind, her mask was off - and she was still obviously a bit intoxicated, but looking much better and more coherent than when I had last seen her. We had a short conversation about how she was actually the famous 'Superheroine,' but was just going through some things and - among other personal issues - had a drug problem, but she'd taken a liking to me and pulled herself together, when she saw that I'd been injured in fighting off those alien/things. She also had a hoverboard, like Goblin Jr. had in Spider-Man 3, and we teamed up to fight against the remaining creatures. The final battle was amazing, and there was a lot of high-flying acrobatics and web swinging. I remember, by the end, I had actually gotten control of her board, still wearing the black Spidey suit, and launched one of the pumpkin grenades up into my hand - from a switch near my foot - caught it, and threw it at the last remaining shape-shifter to kill it.

Pretty bad ass.